Tag: joke
member name: Dawne Joy
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June 06, 2008 12:28 AM EDT --
I love this cartoon
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November 20, 2006 01:16 PM EST --
Your feet stick to the kitchen floor..... and you don't care.
* When the kids are fighting, you threaten to lock them in a room together and not let them out until someone's bleeding.
* You . . .
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December 22, 2006 11:22 PM EST --
A lonely woman, aged 70, decided that it was time to get married. She put an ad in the local paper that read:
HUSBAND WANTED!
MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70's),
MUST NOT BEAT ME,
MUST NOT RUN AROUND . . .
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February 08, 2007 03:06 PM EST --
* How about never? Is never good for you?
* I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
* Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject. . . .
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September 29, 2006 05:21 PM EDT --
My daughter came home from school and told me 2 jokes today. I guess because I am on Gather all the time, she wanted me to publish them. They're really cute.
Why did the bunny . . .
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September 29, 2006 05:44 PM EDT --
I love animals. They taste great.
"Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes."
The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
I.R.S. - We've got what it takes to take what you've got. . . .
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October 06, 2006 04:05 PM EDT --
What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?
"If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!"
If the pilgrims were alive today, what . . .
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February 11, 2007 01:49 AM EST --
JOKE - 1
The cops raided the local brothel and had all the girls standing in line waiting to enter the paddy wagon.
A little old lady walked up and asked one of the girls what the line was . . .
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February 19, 2007 11:37 PM EST --
An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The boy asked . . .
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December 01, 2006 10:03 AM EST --
A man went to see his doctor because he was suffering from a miserable cold. His doctor prescribed some pills, but they didn't help.
On his next visit the doctor gave him a shot, but that didn't . . .
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January 26, 2007 11:39 PM EST --
A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms. Clearly impressed, he buys a pack. Upon getting home he announces to his wife the purchase he just made.
"Olympic condoms?" . . .
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October 28, 2006 01:37 PM EDT --
10.) You wake up at 3 am and stop to check Gather on your way back to bed.
9.) You're husband tells you that he has had the beard for 2 months.
8.) You start introducing yourself to people as mickey . . .
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November 20, 2006 11:59 AM EST --
- No longer signs paychecks in crayon.
- That new "Mr. Happy Meal."
- Distinctive odor of bourbon and stale cigars at personal appearances.
- Two words: sagging buns.
- Replacing floppy red . . .
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November 20, 2006 01:02 PM EST --
Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N. Fresh died yesterday of a severe yeast infection. He was 71. Known to friends as Brown-n-Serve, Fresh was an avid gardener and tennis player.
Fresh was buried in one . . .
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November 20, 2006 05:51 PM EST --
Personal Information:
Name___________ Nickname______________ CB Handle_____
Yore Mama________Yore Daddy (if known)_______
Spouse's Name_________
Relationship to spouse: ___Sister ____Brother ____Mother . . .
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November 19, 2006 05:48 PM EST --
10. The monitor is up on blocks.
9. Outgoing faxes have tobacco stains on them.
8. The six front keys have rotted out.
7. The extra RAM ports have truck parts stored in them.
6. The numeric keypad . . .
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November 20, 2006 12:13 PM EST --
- MTV actually played videos in the 80's.
- There was only one kind of Nike tennis shoes (white with a red swoosh), and they didn't cost $125.
- A comb in your back pocket is more practical and . . .
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November 20, 2006 06:15 PM EST --
"Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy."
"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness."
"Bo! Bo! Come back with that! Bad Dog!" . . .
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December 05, 2006 06:47 PM EST --
10. Instead of saying, "Ho-Ho-Ho," he hollers "Oy vey!"
9. He asks the mothers if they want to sit on his lap.
8. Resume includes appearing as Santa in "Naughty, Naughty Girls." . . .
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December 05, 2006 06:54 PM EST --
Festivity Level 1: Your guests are chatting amiably with each other, admiring your Christmas tree ornaments, singing carols around the upright piano, sipping at their drinks and nibbling hors d'oeuvre. . . .
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